Mistletoe Misconduct
by Howlin Mad Hoffa
Summary: After a hard day of Christmas shopping, Face returns home to an unexpected surprise.  This is not a slash but can be considered a slash. Please R&R!


**Authors Note:This is just a little story that popped in my head one day. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the A-Team. If I did I'd be in Kokomo...Though, Kokomo is just a town in Indiana...Not an island...go figure...**

Part 1

The key turned easily in its lock as Face shoved open the door to the scammed condo. He had just gotten back from a day of tanning and Christmas shopping. Both of his arms were weighed down and covered up to the elbow in shopping bags. Leaning down he carefully maneuvered the B. so he could pick up a stack of boxes he'd lain on the floor.

After shimmying through the door, he took his treasures into the large dinning room. Setting them down on the table Face took a breath. He really outdid himself this year. Over thirty gifts. Not only were there gifts for each member of the team, but he managed to shop for close friends and family as well.

Last Christmas the team had constantly been on the move. Dodging Col. Decker and his MPs. They hadn't had time to even achknowledge the New Year, let alone celebrate it or buy gifts. But this year, Face wanted the guys to have a real Christmas. Complete with; stockings, presents, a big dinner and plenty of egg nog.

Picking out the gifts, was easy enough. For HanniB.A.l, Face had ordered a new, sterling silver lighter with the colonel's name and fammed quote scrawled on the B.. He'd also picked out some khakis and a few wigs for the actor's growing collection.

Shopping for B.A. kept Face in the hardware store for about an hour. He had picked out a fresh serpertine belt for the van and shiny new rachet set -sadly B.A.'s old set was more rust than steel-. Those two items took about ten minutes to find, but there was something else Face needed. Something B.A. had seen in a magazine two months ago and nearly keeled over in excitement just by looking at.

A Mach-one pit stop Impact with triple action; air compressor/pump and pressure gauge. Long winded, high priced, and extremely cool.

Apparently B.A. wasn't the only one who wanted one of these magical tire machines. The product waiting list was as long as his...well, it was long. Turns out though, the hardware store had just gotten the first shipment in. After roughly fourty minutes of flirting and word play with the pretty assistant manager, Face walked out of the store with his prize.

Murdock was surpisingly difficult to shop for. Face had gotten him the same type of gifts for every birthday, un-birthday, and Christmas. Comics, new hightops, books on flight and flying, games, etc...This year needed to be different. So, he got him the one thing he knew the pilot didn't have; a theme park. Not a real one of course, this was a toy. A scale model that you can rearange and set up any way you like. Complete with park rides, consession stands, and three roller coasters. All fully funtional. Well, you can't actually make cotton candy, but the tiny cotton candy machine does spin.

Not wanting his friend to have only one giant present to open he asked the store to re-box all of the models. In total, Murdock had around ten presents to open. Half of which were still in his 'vette.

All in all, he thought he did pretty good.

Face left the dinning room to get some wrapping paper and tape but paused, shocked at what he saw in the living room. Standing across from him in the room, about three feet away from the tree and wearing the most stunning dress Face had ever seen her in, was Amy.

Part 2

Her brown hair was in a half down up-do that framed her heart shaped face. The lipstick she wore brought out her pale features and matched the deep, wine red dress she wore.

Realizing his mouth was adjar the conman snapped it shut and tried to regain a little composure. _*Sweet Jesus. I knew Amy could clean up, but that dress...where has she been hiding _that _little number? Hell, if she's been hiding that I wonder what I'd find underneath-*_

"You done staring Temp?" The seductive caress of her voice brought him quickly from his thoughts, but didn't help tame them.

"Uh, sorry Amy. I've just never seen you in something so...um..." his words began to faulter. _*Faulter? I'm Faceman Peck! I don't faulter in front of women, I make _them _faulter! I warm 'em up with a smile, get 'em hot with a wink, and set 'em ablaze with a touch. Of course never Amy. She's just a friend, an associate, a buddy. She's one of the guys. Of course _none_ of the guys could pull off _that_ dress. The low back, the equally low princess cut neckline, the seemingly delicate fabric barely containing her generous sized brea- _Okay_! We are _not_ going to go there!*_ His thoughts flew by within seconds, but reflected in his pause. Causing his pause to seem like more of a hesitation.

Amy must have noticed this, because she raised an eyebrow and gave him a knowing grin.

_*Play it cool damn it!*_

Clearing his throat sternly he nodded with a nonchalant shrug, "You look good." Flashing his perfect smile he added, "Special occasion?"

_*Nice, this is good. Play it off like its nothing.* _

The giggle she offered was just as sensuous as her voice. His smile faultered slightly. _*Again...really?* _She mimicked his shrug and began a slow, black heeled saunter towards him, "You could say that."

_*What the hell? Have I been giving her tips or something?*_

"Really?" he raised a brow curiously, "Going out on a big date or...?" _*Alright, act genuinly interested but stay neutral. Keep her talking and she might stop walking.* _

But she didn't stop walking, she walked right up to him until she was only inches away. Smiling mischivously Amy shook her head lightly, "No, no date." Her smile got wider as she ran a single finger down his chest to the end of his tie, "Well, not _yet_ anyway."

_*_Neutral_! Dear God, stay neutral!Sweeden, Sweeden, _Sweeden_!*_

This time Face didn't faulter, he was just plain stunned. His mind went blank as her hand started moving back up his tie again. When she reached the knot around his neck she slipped her fingers under it and gave it a gentle tug. Moving backwards, Amy began leading him towards the tree. And the couch.

Face all but whimpered. _*...Help.*_

Part 3

Before they reached the couch Amy giggled again, _*That damn giggle!* _and changed directions. She kept leading him forward until they were near the fireplace, "You look tense Face. Anything the matter?" He resisted the urge to glare at her.

_*You know _exactly_ what the matter is, you damndable siren.*_

Keeping his thoughts to himself he merely shrugged, "Not really. I don't feel tense, quite relaxed actually." Removing her hand from his tie Amy cocked her head to the side in mock-concern, "Are you sure? You look a little nervous to me."

_*Understatement of the year! Get it together man!*_

"I'm fine Amy, really." Face chuckled, flashing another smile, "So, now that we're on the other side of the room, is there anything I can help you with?"

She returned the smile and let her eyes roam over him shamelessly, "Well, there is one thing I wanted you for."

"I see," he paused considering her. _*Double meaning quip; stated and understood. Please God get me out of this! I mean, it's not that Amy's bad looking. She's beautiful! But she's one of the guys! Just not a guy. _So _not a guy! But one of the guys none the less! Just not in that dress. Not with those sparkling brown eyes so much like a shiny Lindt truffle. A woman with eyes like that _has_ to have a sweet creamy center, you just have to bite the right place and- _Whoa_!*_ His smile never left his namesake, "and what would that be?"

She leaned in, locking eyes with him and making the very small amount of space between them dissapear. Face could feel her heartbeat against his chest and feel _his_ heartbeat in his ears. He knew he was visibly blushing, which just made him blush deeper, "Um, Amy?"

Her eyes had a mischivous glimmer to them as she glanced upward, "See that Face?" His eyes followed hers until they landed on a green sprig with little red berries on it. Someone had hung it from the recessed lights._ *Where the hell did that come from?*_

"Mistletoe? Oh I see, so you want a kiss?" Face let himelf relax a bit.

She nodded and began smoothing down his tie with one hand while the other played with his shirt collar, "Is that alright Temp?" The seductive tone in her voice held no uncertainty, and made Face's gut tighten. _*Among other things. Damn it.*_

Pushing back his own uncertainty Face laughed, "Sure. Since when does The Faceman turn down a kiss from a pretty lady?"

His statement made her grin widen and she bit down on her lower lip. "Well then," he could feel her soft breath on his face as she whispered, "close your eyes."

He eyed her with mock-suspicion, "Why? I thought you wanted _me_ to kiss _you_?"

She reached up and used a hand to slide his eyes closed, "Just go with it Lieutenant." And with that she closed the distance.

Part 4

Before their lips could do more than brush Amy pulled away, "Wait, I forgot something." His eyes snapped open and he found himself being relieved of his tie. Her hands made quick work undoing the knot as she made her way around him.

"What are you doing?" the uncertainty in his voice wasn't just present, it was dominant.

Giving him another torturous giggle Amy began sliding the tie over Face's eyes, "Just a precausion. Can't have you peeking now can we?"

After the tie was securely in place Face was officially blind. _*Of course, I knew this would happen one day. My fashion sense has finally been my undoing.*_

"Are you ready Temp?" the sound of her voice came from right in front of him, and he could feel her breath puffing out with every word. The way she said his name made his face flush.

_*Alright, if I'm gonna kiss her then I might as well give'er all I've got. Don't want her saying those three horrible words. "Is that it?" My rep would be ruined. Okay, lets do this.* _

"Ready when you are," he let go of all uncertainty as her lips locked with his.

The kiss was timmid at first, barely a brush of the lips, but soon they found a slow rhythm.

_*Woah, Amy definitely knows what she's doing.*_

Her lips were soft against his. He couldn't believe how a woman, who mere moments ago was acting like a professional seductress, could now be so gentle with him. The whiplash it gave him was paired with the desire to learn how far she would let him take her.

He tried to snake his arms around her waist, but stopped when he remembered their agreement, _"I want a kiss Face, not a feel up. No hands." He reluctantly accepted her terms._The only exception to the rule is that she was allowed to touch his chest for leverage.

Face could taste her lipstick and smell her perfume as their lips moved together. The mixture was sweet and he found himself drifting in and out of awareness. Awareness of anything but the feel and taste that was simply her. He found himself wanting more, wanting to taste the real Amy. To indulge in a delicacy other men will never get the chance to try. To find out if she really was sweet like a Lindt truffle.

With a skillful tongue Face begged entrance to that sweetness. But she denied him. Another moment passed before he tried again, but was given the same answer. He was so close to what he truely wanted, but didn't want to push her away. Still, how could she be so cruel as to deny him twice?

Breaking from the kiss the conman found himself winded, "Wow," he breathed out before letting his hands go up to remove the tie from his eyes, "Amy, that was-" Face let the tie fall to the ground as he studied the person in front of him.

Brown hair in a half down up-do. Silky wine red dress paired with matching lips -though these were a bit smeared-. Chocolate brown eyes looked up at him, but they weren't sparkling. They looked pathetic. Saucer huge. Worried. And a little crazy...

Part 5

Face's scream could be heard all throughoutManhattan. From their current station inL.A., that was an impressive feat.

_"Murdock?"_ the conman didn't just back up, he shot back so hard he hit the wall twelve feet away. Causing a large painting to hit the floor with a sharp thud-thwack.

Murdock got off of the foot tall step stool he'd been kneeling on and held up a finger, "Now hold on a minute Muchacho, this was _not_ my idea!" The pilot grabbed a handfull of the unziped dress he was wearing and held it out as he walked. He looked like a kid playing dress up. His wig was one ofHannibal's that had been made up to look like Amy's hair.

He stalked over to a box of tissues next to the couch and began whiping his mouth off, "This was Amy's; idea, plan, and fault! I had nothing to do with it until I lost that damned bet!"

Up until that point Face had been stunned speechless, now he was too confused _not_ to ask questions, "Wh-what? _Her_ idea? What the _hell_ are you talking about? What _bet_?"

He stormed up to them but kept his distance from Murdock. "Why did you try and seduce me?" he pointed at Amy. "Why are you in a dress?" this question was aimed at the captain. "And what the _hell _did I do to deserve this?" Face was fuming, and beyond pissed.

Sensing that he should keep quiet Murdock looked to Amy who smiled smugly and sat down on the couch. "Face, I've been looking for a way to get back at you since you cost me that date back in October." She crossed her legs and watched the confusion run over the lieutenant's face.

_*Date? What the hell is she talking abou-*_ It dawned on him.

He grit his teeth and glared at the brunette before him. She looked so smug, like she'd just won the war. _*This war is far from over honey.*_

"You mean that guy at the Halloween Bash? The one in the Navy uniform?"

She nodded once in responce.

His anger leveled out a bit, knowledge giving him the upper hand, "He wasn't interested in you Amy. He couldn't have been."

She gave him a look that would rival acid, "Ex-_cuse_ me? He was definitely interested in me! He had been flirting with me all night! But you kept insisting on dancing with me, so he assumed you were my boyfriend and backed off! He had a job, a dog, and a great sense of humor!" she fumed, "He was nice, well dressed, smart-"

"Gay."

"-adjusted, financially sta-...what?"

Face gave her his own smug grin, "He was gay babe."

Frowning Amy crossed her legs, her black heels peeking from under the red material, "He was _not_ gay. He left with another brunette!"

Face's barking laughter was just as condesending as he wanted it to be, "Yeah, he left with a brunette. Who also happened to be a drag queen."

Amy shook her head, refusing to believe that this was anything other than Face trying to make her feel ditzy, but Murdock chose right then to step in.

"Amy, Muchacha," he covered his face with one hand before continuing, "Is that what this is all about? This is why you made me kiss Face?" She looked away and gave a small shrug. Sighing the captain let his hand fall from his chin, "Faceman isn't lyin' to you Amy, that guy was definitely not playing on the right side of the field."

Watching the two men watch her, Amy suddenly felt very embarrased, "So, I guess this was all just a big misunderstanding, huh?"

_*A misun- A _misunderstanding_? You've got to be kidding me!*_

"Amy," Face began, breathing slowly, "this wasn't a misunderstanding. The Halloween Party, _that _was a misunderstanding. This? This is just plain insane!"

"Damn right it is," Murdock piped up, and Face had to do a double take. The pilot had a compact mirror out and was brushing a few loose strands of hair back into place.

"Murdock!" the lieutenant snapped, causing Murdock to snap his compact closed.

"Yeah?" the pilot beamed at him from his place on the couch.

Knowing that it would be useless to ask Face paused. There was another question that both Murdock and Amy had failed to answer. Looking between the two the conman plopped down into a chair, "Alright, I have to know Murdock." The captain turned to him as Face continued, "What bet could you have possibly lost to make you have to go through with all of this?"

As if he was expecting a harder question than that, Murdock's face lit up, "Well, Amy and I were playing that ol' Chinese ball in cup game, and she bet me I couldn't make it ten times in a row. Got it in six times but that seventh go is always a tricky one."

_*Chinese ball in cup game...*_

Face could feel a headache starting, "Let me get this straight. It took me three hours and a sedative to get you to the damn dentist, but for one lost bet on a round of 'ball in cup' you'll dress in drag and french a guy?"

Murdock pondered this for a moment but Face already knew the answer. Amy hadn't said anything for a while, and when he looked up to check on her she was gone. _*Go ahead and run, you're getting a tarantula for Christmas.*_

"Facey?"

Murdock's questioning voice drew back his attention, "Yeah man?"

The captain had a quizical look on his face and was lightly smacking his lips together, "I can't get the taste of coconut out of my mouth. Did you go tanning today?"

End.


End file.
